Realistic Resolutions

Image: America Digital

Written by: Dinelsa Morales, Ph.D, TFC, MSW intern

For: Hispanic Family Counseling Inc. Newsletter December 2022 Edition

The month of December has arrived, and with it, we are facing a time that implies changes, resolutions, closing cycles, and reflection. If I personally evaluate what this month means to me, I can say that it is one of the most difficult and risky months in which I have seen my life constantly falter. However, here we are, we continue on our way and still with the hopes of a new tomorrow, with the desire to continue forward and see what the future holds for us. But, towards the future you cannot walk if you do not have those realistic resolutions planned that go hand in hand with our reality.

The word REALISTIC implies that each goal you plan can become a reality of your day to day. It also means how you can carry out, in the long and short term, each of your purposes. In other words, each resolution that you put on your list will be the solution to each of the problems that you could not handle this past year, and, for this reason, you commit to working on it as a priority this upcoming year.

Life is divided into cycles that start and end a stage, because of this, it is a mental rest to think that we can start again. From this, one can say that human beings develop New Year's resolutions. It is an unconscious message that we send to our body, saying that "what happened yesterday is useless if we can start over". But, unfortunately, many people continue in the vicious circle of maintaining unreal or unattainable desires, which do not go according to their capacities and everything remains a simple dream that will not be realized.

Resolutions are or should be projects, not dreams, because projects involve steps to be able to achieve them while not all dreams come true, this is a reality that we have to face. Only when we change our perspective of seeing life processes, and start making concrete decisions about what we want to achieve, we will stop seeing things as dreams and start seeing them as projects.

So, how do I develop a list of realistic resolutions?

First, detail your priorities. Identify the projects you want to handle from least to greatest degree. It is important to develop one goal at a time, to avoid frustration. This means that you will place first what you can carry out with the resources you currently have.

For example, one of the goals that almost all of us put in the first place is to "Improve our physical condition for better health" . You will put it in the first place when you decide how you will implement it, some example of how to carry it out can be, sign up for the gym or decide 3 days a week in which you will go for a run or walk. Evaluate your economic and time possibilities. And within the framework of your possibilities take an action.

Whether it's committing to a monthly gym fee, drawing up a budget to buy the components of your healthy diet or managing time to exercise. The important thing is that you celebrate each step you take to meet your goal and thus convey the information that you are achieving it.

If your resolution is on a large scale, such as acquiring a property or a car, you should go little by little, your realistic resolutions will range from creating a savings account, evaluating monthly insurance costs and payments, until the time comes to the purchase.

Don't put things you can't achieve on your resolution list. Since they will cause you anxiety and frustration and these two negative sensations only lead you to the sense of helplessness. Therefore, be honest with yourself and face the reality that you live with joy, there is no shame in going little by little. Every time you see that you have been able to really comply with each of the resolutions on your list, you will feel satisfied and empowered to continue with your short and long-term projects.

Don't be discouraged!! The biggest dreams in life take effort and commitment on our part, this is just the beginning.